Note on the Clifton fridge:
"Whoever ate my yogurt is the biggest fucking asshole ever"

"When I heard the Prisoner was taken, I went and examined him, and this he confess'd himself to me, My Wife and I quarrell'd on Wednesday and she going out I follow'd her, and by the Way seeing some Stones, I flung 'em at her; after which she went and lay down in the back House, upon which I followed her, she lay down, and I laid the Door upon her, and then sate upon her for some considerable Time; after this I laid her out, and covered her with Hay, and then left her."

"FYI, don't sit next to a window naked. It's cold"

"Today would be a good day for a backyard orgy"

"Third fold: Swan"

"Don't worry, baby, you don't have a cheerleader butt"

"BED NINJA"